Shrekking, the new dating trend that has social media users divided
Shrek, one of DreamWorks' most beloved animated characters, has become the figurehead for a toxic new dating trend that’s divided the internet. But what is Shrekking?
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Shrek, one of DreamWorks' most beloved animated characters, has become the figurehead for a toxic new dating trend that’s divided the internet. But what is Shrekking?
“Relationships get tough. In the tough times, I can’t be looking at an ugly face,” said one TikTok user in response to a video about Shrekking.
@colettejanefehr Dating down to feel safe? That’s Shrekking — and it doesn’t work. Gratitude fades, “less” doesn’t mean healthy, and without attraction, you won’t stay invested. Love is always a risk, but it’s the only way to get the reward. #datingadvice #relationships #datingtips #therapistonTikTok #relationshipproblems ♬ original sound - Colette Jane Fehr
The new dating phenomenon, “Shrekking,” popularized by Gen Z daters, has swept the internet and divided opinions.
Shrekking is when people, usually women, “date down” and engage in relationships with people who are significantly less attractive than they are in the hopes that they will treat them better.
However, the problem with Shrekking lies when “the Shrek” treats them poorly anyway.
“Yep, I dated an ugly guy and totally regret it. He didn’t treat me better,” one TikTok user said.
“Yup! Charity work is a no-no,” said another TikTok user.
While people have united over the Shrekking trend, others feel that this is yet another method for women to discredit and demean men.
“It’s not OK to belittle someone or put them down through name-calling. We’re not in grade school anymore,” said one male TikTok user in response to one woman’s video supporting the trend.
The TikTok video, found by The New York Post, shows a woman explaining what Shrekking is and ultimately saying that she’s “here for it.”
@thisiswhyimsingle2024 Getting shreked. I’m here for it 🤣 #shreked #onlinedating #datingsucks ♬ original sound - Bekah
“Ah, yes. let's keep demeaning men forevermore,” said one TikTok user in response.
Over on the other side of the internet, X users are commenting on the new trend, some condemning Shrekking, while others share their own experiences about being let down by “ugly” men.
“Please don't do this – it's setting unfair expectations for that person, and to be honest, a little hurtful. It's okay to want to be attracted to your partner,” said one X user.
RE: undefinedShrekkingundefined or dating someone you're not physically attracted to in hopes they treat you better
undefined Grover Wimberly IV ♠ 🦋 (@GroverWhim) August 23, 2025
Please don't do this - it's setting unfair expectations to that person, and to be honest, a little hurtful. It's okay to want to be attracted to your partner
“Come on, man....It’s not enough I resemble an Ogre, now if an attractive female dates me, she's ‘Shrekking.’ Not great for the ole self-esteem,” said another X user in response.
Come on man....Its not enough I resemble an Ogre, now if an attractive female dates me she's undefinedShrekkingundefined Not great for the ole self esteem. Fuck. https://t.co/D6YmF7xFVG
undefined goddofbeer (@goddofbeer) August 22, 2025
Sixty-three percent of men in 2023 described themselves as single, a stark difference from the 34% of women who described themselves that way, the Pew Research Center found.
Since then, the figures have slightly declined, as the number of unpartnered people in the US decreased from 44% to 42% between 2019 and 2023.
This may be due to the influence of online dating and these kinds of dating trends that, while they can seem demeaning, seem to foster and encourage relationships.